Because no election coverage is complete without two cows. And because the stress is giving your correspondent insomnia.
CASSIDY, Andrew
You have two cows. On your farm. You drink their milk, harness them to your plough, make them thresh the grain, and heat your house with cow chips. You're ready for peak oil.
LEFEBVRE, Brian
You don't have two cows, but you're going to find enough efficiencies in your neighbours' herds to free up plenty of cows.
CANDOW, Roger
You have two cows. The number of cows has increased by 80% over 2008. Why have the taxpayers been made to pay for so many extra cows?
COAKWELL, Jason
You have two cows. Three more and you'll have a hockey team.
DOHEY, Keith
You're 23, born and raised in Hay River. Why are we talking about cows?
GIBB, Beverly
You have two cows. You share lengthy personal stories with them. Cows are good listeners.
JAMESON, Kandis
You have two cows. One runs for DEA, one runs for Council. Yay, teamwork!
JUNGKIND, Donna Lee
You have two cows. They totally agree with Brad's cows.
LATOUR, Ken
You have two cows. You feed one and not the other. The one you feed lives, the other dies. You retire from cattle farming.
LESTER, Sandra
You have two cows. They're picketing the new firehall to demand the return of plebiscites.
MAHER, Michael John
You have two cows, but they're out of town.
MAPES, Bradley Lloyd
You have two cows. You trade them for books to teach under-privileged children to read.
MARIE, Elise
You have two cows. You share them with all your socialist brethren around the world. ¡Viva la revolución!
McKAY, Vince
You have two cows and that doesn't leave you any time for campaigning.
McPHERSON, James W.
You have two cows. They work closely with our MLAs' cows.
ST. JOHN, Michael
Vous avez deux vaches. Et cinq enfants. Keep calm and carry on.
WILLOWS, Brian K.
You have two cows. You keep one on each side to maintain balance.
CASSIDY, Andrew
You have two cows. On your farm. You drink their milk, harness them to your plough, make them thresh the grain, and heat your house with cow chips. You're ready for peak oil.
LEFEBVRE, Brian
You don't have two cows, but you're going to find enough efficiencies in your neighbours' herds to free up plenty of cows.
CANDOW, Roger
You have two cows. The number of cows has increased by 80% over 2008. Why have the taxpayers been made to pay for so many extra cows?
COAKWELL, Jason
You have two cows. Three more and you'll have a hockey team.
DOHEY, Keith
You're 23, born and raised in Hay River. Why are we talking about cows?
GIBB, Beverly
You have two cows. You share lengthy personal stories with them. Cows are good listeners.
JAMESON, Kandis
You have two cows. One runs for DEA, one runs for Council. Yay, teamwork!
JUNGKIND, Donna Lee
You have two cows. They totally agree with Brad's cows.
LATOUR, Ken
You have two cows. You feed one and not the other. The one you feed lives, the other dies. You retire from cattle farming.
LESTER, Sandra
You have two cows. They're picketing the new firehall to demand the return of plebiscites.
MAHER, Michael John
You have two cows, but they're out of town.
MAPES, Bradley Lloyd
You have two cows. You trade them for books to teach under-privileged children to read.
MARIE, Elise
You have two cows. You share them with all your socialist brethren around the world. ¡Viva la revolución!
McKAY, Vince
You have two cows and that doesn't leave you any time for campaigning.
McPHERSON, James W.
You have two cows. They work closely with our MLAs' cows.
ST. JOHN, Michael
Vous avez deux vaches. Et cinq enfants. Keep calm and carry on.
WILLOWS, Brian K.
You have two cows. You keep one on each side to maintain balance.
2 comments:
This is funny and witty. I wish I saw it before the election. It wouldn't have influenced my vote, but it would have been extra funny.
Thanks. I'm glad people understood it as funny and not snarky. :)
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